There is never a jolly good ride in any relationship. Every relationship surely has its ups and downs; and a large part of the time, it is due to individual differences.
However, some relationships are basically over even before the real break up happens. Both partners may have sensed it coming and just ignore it rather than try to rejuvenate the relationship.
Like someone said, “you need to know when a relationship is over so you don’t try to keep raising the dead. You need to know when it is dead.”
Here are the most common signs of a relationship with an impending end.
1. No more jealousy: This is one of the very first sign of a bad relationship. Healthy jealousy is one of the mutual characteristics of lovers. It shows that you have marked that person as your own. If anyone tries to trespass, you will often feel jealous because you feel your partner is your territory. But should there be a time that you or your partner stops feeling jealous about each other, it is a serious sign. It means your partner has concluded that he/she can do without you. It’s like the famous saying, “good riddance to bad rubbish”.
2. You both stop doing the little things: You will agree with me that most of the best things in a relationship happen when your partner does little things for you that you can probably even do by yourself. Why is it so? Because you were not expecting it but he/she did it anyway. When you and your partner quit doing little things that you have done for each other, it often means that you no longer see each other as special like before.
3. One partner is holding out: A relationship is between two people and it requires the efforts and inputs of the two partners to succeed. It is a known fact already that a one sided relationship cannot survive. So, in a situation where only one partner is now doing everything in a relationship, it means the other partner feels the relationship is not worth their time or energy. Guess which of the partner is most likely going to be trying to make things work? It is the partner who invested the most!
4. Communication dwindles: Usually, a relationship between two people makes them very close friends (or most times, best friends) and this means that they can talk to each other a lot about almost everything. In the same vein, they are able to discuss their feelings, future plans and other heart-to-heart talks. But if the relationship is about to end, reverse will be the case. There may be “hellos” and the usual “how are you doing” conversations but that is about all the discussion gets. One partner or the two partners just withdraw from the real essence of the communication they once shared.
5. Irritation kicks in: When two people are in love, they are usually excited about each other’s attraction and tolerant of each other’s weaknesses and shortcomings. But when the relationship gets sour, even the very thing that attracted them to each other can become a source of irritation. A partner who was admired because he was often quiet may soon be resented by the other because he rarely talks. Worse still, even casual things may cause you or your partner to be angry with each other. Once this kicks in and it is not resolved, it can be a big hole in the relationship.
6. Relationship Sabotage: This is obviously the cruelest sign in the list. When one partner is tired of the relationship but does not want to initiate the break up, the partner may begin to do things that will get the other partner angry. What is the goal? To push the other to the point of least resistance. If the person finally decides to quit, the aim is achieved. On the other hand, if the partner tolerates it, the resentment will just get bigger. So, if your partner is doing anything like this, he or she just wants to push you to the brink to do the break up yourself.
7. Your partner gets busy: This is the ultimate sign. Everybody is busy with one thing or the other. We just always create time for those who we believe are worth it. So, if your partner becomes so busy all of a sudden that you both rarely spend time together; it could be an indication that he/she is no longer interested in the relationship. People tend to avoid what they cannot deal with.
If at least four of these signs shows up in a relationship, you should know that the end is near. Every faulty relationship can be worked out but if your partner’s heart is no longer there, there is no amount of sweet talking or kind gestures that will bring them back.
DO you agree with these points? What other signs do you think show a crashing relationship?